Child abuse is definitely a serious issue and more so when it is done by the parents themselves. Though most people will not believe that parents can abuse their own children, it is a problem that is faced by many young children irrespective to class, race, gender and country. Most people think that child abuse by parents is only physical, however, this is totally untrue. Rather, there are various types of abuse that children can suffer from the parents.
Parental abuse can be emotional, physical and sometimes even sexual. However, the most common and severe parental abuse is when they neglect their children physically as well as emotionally. Exposure to such kind of abuse can cause serious distress in children as the people who are supposed to love and take care of them while in distress are the ones who are actually hurting them. As abusive and neglectful parents can cause severe physical, mental and emotional damage to the children and hamper their normal development, it is important to recognize and take care of children who are being abused by their parents. Hence, let us take a look at abusive parents facts and the effects they can have on children.
What Causes Abusiveness in Parents?
One of the common reason for parents to become abusive towards their kids is that they themselves have experienced it during their childhood. Many people do not even realize that they are abusing their children because such kind of behavior would be something that they would consider as normal. Some parents take aggression and violence as a way of controlling their children. Apart from this, parents who are suffering from certain kind of mental illness or personality disorder can also be abusive towards their children. Moreover, children with parents who have a drinking problem or substance abuse can also become victims of parental abuse as they may be neglected by their parents totally.
Signs of a Child Dealing with Abusive Parents
As the abusers, in this case, are parents themselves, recognizing the signs of abuse can be a little difficult for an outsider. Moreover, children who are victims of the abuse may not come up with the issue because of the fear of getting hurt by their caregivers again. Nevertheless, there are some signs that one can look for, if they suspect that a child is undergoing abuse by his/her parents.
Signs of Physical Abuse
Physical abuse is surely the one that can be recognized easily. Physical abuse like hitting, pinching, beating, shaking, burning, etc., are often used by parents as ways of punishing their children for some wrongdoing. They think that it is the best way of disciplining their children. However, this causes the development of fear in children towards their parents. Children who are being physically abused by their parents can be seen with unexplained and frequent injuries like cuts, bruises and welts. They may shy away from touch or may seem to be afraid of going home.
Signs of Emotional Abuse
Little children need love and attention from their parents during their growing up years to feel secured. This should be done not just by buying them gifts, but also by hugging and kissing them. Also, kids like to be appreciated for their achievements by their parents, even if it is small one. However, when this does not happen and the child is humiliated at every step by the parents by calling her a stupid or a fool, the kid can be said to be a victim of emotional child abuse. Such parents may call the child worthless and constantly compare her negatively with other children. Emotionally abusive parents may punish their child by yelling and threatening her or may be by ignoring her completely.
Children who are exposed to domestic violence i.e. if one of the parents is abusing the other, the child can be called a victim of emotional violence. Children who are emotionally abused by their parents are usually fearful, anxious and withdrawn. They may not show any kind of attachment towards their parents or caregiver. They may exhibit extreme behavior, i.e., some kids may behave like adults, while others may show infantile behavior like throwing temper tantrums, rocking, thumb sucking, etc.
Signs of Child Neglect
Parental neglect is said to be one of the most difficult type of abuse to detect as well as to define. Neglect can be defined as a situation where the parents completely ignore the children, both physically as well as emotionally. Such parents may not bother to fulfill their children's basic needs like proper food, clothing, etc. They may leave their children unsupervised at home or at places where the children are not safe. Some of the warning signs that people can observe in a child who is neglected by his parents are filthy and ill fitting clothes, untreated physical injuries and health problems, etc.
Signs of Sexual Abuse
Sexual abuse of children is not uncommon, though hardly spoken of. In most cases, the culprit is a close friend or relative and in certain cases, parents themselves. Though people think that only girls become victims of sexual abuse, this is actually quite untrue. Rather, even little boys can become victims of sexual abuse. Children who are abused sexually are usually filled with shame and guilt and are likely to blame themselves for the happenings. Some of the signs that a sexually abused kid may show include difficulty in sitting or walking, making efforts for avoiding a person, showing knowledge about sexual acts, etc.
Abusive Parents: Effect on Children
Growing up in an environment where their physical, emotional and mental needs are not fulfilled does have a strong negative impact on the minds of children. Though the scars left by physical violence will not last for a long time, the emotional scars etched on their minds are permanent and can damage their life as adults.
- Children who have suffered abuse from their parents usually find it difficult to form and maintain long-lasting relationships as adults. As the emotional needs like trust, security, reliability, etc. are not fulfilled in the relationship with the parents, the children are not able to form good and healthy relationships because they do not understand that these are the basic things that are required to maintain a loving relationship.
- Living with abusive parents can hamper the self-esteem of children as parents constantly telling them that they are stupid and worthless for a long time, may make them that it is actually true. As adults, they may not be ready to take up challenges like higher studies, better job, etc., because they may consider themselves as incapable of such achievements.
- The emotional damage caused by sexual abuse, especially by their parents will be most severe. They may live with the feeling of shame and stigma throughout their adult life. Sometimes, this may lead to the occurrence of severe mental as well as psychological problems in the person.
- Children of abusive parents may have difficulty in expressing as well as for controlling their emotions. They are also likely to get addicted to alcohol or drugs, just to relieve the painful thoughts caused by parental abuse.
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Article from Buzzle.com
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